My 5th grade teacher asked us all to write about the one thing I could change if I could. We would say our speech in front of the class, then the top 2 would say the speech in front of the whole school. The top 2 from that would compete in the District Wide Bank of America Speech Contest. This was my first year (of 4) competing in the Speech Contest. I was 10 years old and this was the first time I ever spoke about my sister after her death, 3 years prior. Miraculously, this speech helped me deal with grief and heartache. As I cried all 3 times I said this speech in front of my class, my school, and the district, my classmates, my teachers, and the judges did too. This was the moment I realized that my voice, regardless of my youth, could influence and impact a crowd... as they hung on to my every word and delivery. As a 10 year old little girl, it was the first time I felt my potential to be powerful and influential. Here it goes:
Judges, teachers, parents, fellow students, friends, Good Evening
My name is Patricia Rodriguez. I am here to talk about "The thing I want to change if I could!" At first, I was thinking of changing people who do drugs, steal, kill, kidnap, and all those crimes our society is having problems with, right now. Also, I was thinking of changing the lives and help the homeless and the less privileged people. However, I thought that people make these problems and they were the only ones who could help or change themselves.
So, I thought of something else. Something that is impossible to happen. First, I would like to make a background of my family. I belong to a simple yet a wonderful and happy family. Not everybody is blessed with this and I am so proud and thankful for that. My parents are gifted with four children. They are Erene or Cookie as we called her, my brother Mervene, my baby sister Renee, and of course me, as the eldest. We were very close especially Cookie and I. We did all things together as our ages were pretty close. We played, ate, slept, and went to school together. Ours was a very special bonding that up to now I always cherish. Everything went on perfectly in our own little world.
Suddenly, she was diagnosed with cancer. She was barely four when she got sick. Everyone in the family was devastated, including me. When I saw the kids in the hospital were bald, I feared that my dear sister would be like them too. But, the most fearful thing that I was thinking was, how can she ever get through with it?
My sister asked my mom, "Mom, was there anything that I did that made me sick?" My mom, almost in tears, assured her that there was nothing that she did and nothing that she did not do that made her sick. She added that sometimes in life, things happen without us knowing why it happened. The important thing is that we learn to accept and deal with them.
She had her daily shots, treatments, chemotherapy, bone marrow transplant and more. She had been poked, punctured, and irradiated without complains. These were part of her battle plans, which she had learned to deal with.
With all these, I saw her pains but behind those pains I saw her strength. She experienced fears but behind those fears I could see her courage. She went through disappointments yet I see hope. I saw her cries but behind those cries, I saw her joys. My brother and I also needed my parents' precious time but my sister wasn't selfish to share my parents' time with us.
Since I was the eldest, I thought that I was the one teaching her the facts of life…but then I realized that I was wrong. It was the other way around.
I was just so proud of her for what she had gone through. She was young and yet old enough beyond her years. She has taught us and other people the value of LIFE as well as unselfishness, courage, understanding, and maturity…Most of all, she taught me to LOVE and to LOVE dearly!
My mom told us that this was the time for us not just to hold hands but to hug each other because these times we needed each other more. If one would let go, we would all fall. We prayed day and night asking that the doctors would help my sister be healed but the doctors tried everything they could do for her.
I always heard my mom say “Let’s hope for the best but also let’s prepare for the worst.” On August 23, 1997, our greatest fear came. Just right after we prayed the rosary, she died in my mother’s arms. My mom said to her “Cookie, we will always love you and will always be proud of you!” We hugged and kissed her goodbye…Then, she closed her eyes.
She passed away when she was six and just finished her kindergarten…her only wish and my mother’s last hope! She loved going to school very much.
With these experiences, no matter how painful and tragic, have taught me and my family, life-long lessons to treasure. Cookie brought out the best in us and we could only hope the same for her during her short years with us.
With these trials my family had gone through, I became more matured and strong…We have fought the trials and we fought it too well. I miss my sister so much but she left behind good memories of our friendship…Now the question…”If I could change anything, what would it be?” I wish I could bring back the LIFE of my sister…
Kids, always remember to give love to our dear ones and when we do, let’s love them dearly for you don’t know how long you could be together…Thank you!
